The Sugar Daddy Podcast
Ready to normalize talking about money? Then welcome to The Sugar Daddy Podcast. Every episode will get you one step closer to your financial goals. Whether that is learning how to invest, budget, save, retire early or simply make better money choices, Jess & Brandon have got you covered in a way that's easy to understand, and easy to implement. Tune in as they demystify the realm of dollars, so it all makes cents, while giving you a glimpse into their relationship with money and each other.
Brandon is an award winning licensed financial planner, and owner of Oak City Financial, with over a decade of experience and millions of dollars managed for his clients all over the United States.
New episodes published the first three Wednesdays of every month.
The Sugar Daddy Podcast
92: From Undocumented to Financially Free: Charly Stoever’s Money Journey
*This episode contains profanity and may not be suited for children under age 13
Charly Stoever has worn many hats—undocumented immigrant, stockbroker, money coach, and global adventurer. In this raw and inspiring conversation, they unpack how a childhood shaped by financial uncertainty led to a life of intentional wealth-building.
From a full ride to Wellesley to living on Peace Corps stipends, Charly eventually found their money “aha moment” in a simple stock market chart—leading to a career in finance and a mission to help LGBTQ+, BIPOC, and neurodivergent high earners build passive income.
We talk identity, financial trauma, wellness, and why pet-sitting your way through 36 countries might just be a genius wealth strategy. Charly’s advice is as bold as it is practical: “If you can fully fund happy hour, you can fully fund your 401k.”
This episode is a blueprint for building wealth on your own terms—especially if you’ve never had a safety net.
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This episode is sponsored by Prenupscom. The truth is, every married couple has a prenup a set of rules that defines your legal and financial relationship with your spouse. You either choose your own rules or use what your state gives you. At Prenupscom they write prenups that actually help couples stay married. Their specialty is fair prenups that help couples plan for a healthy financial relationship. Don't let the state decide your marriage rules. Make your own. Visit prenupscom. Slash sugardaddy to learn more. That's prenupscom. Backslash sugardaddy and get the prenup that helps you stay married. Already married, no worries, they do post-nuptial agreements too. That's what Brandon and I did after eight years of marriage.
Speaker 1:In today's episode we have a special guest, charlie Stover, who was a formerly undocumented Mexican-American turned stockbroker, also happens to be our first trans guest, and we are going to talk about their journey from being undocumented to being a stockbroker and everything in between that has led them to live the life that they currently are helping people in their money coaching program while traveling internationally, healing from all sorts of different traumas and living their very best life. If that's of interest, we hope you'll stay tuned, hey babe. Learn how to make them pockets grow.
Speaker 2:Financial freedom's where we go. Smart investments, money flow.
Speaker 1:Hey babe, what are we talking about today? Everything Today we are going to talk about all the things. We have a very special guest with us who is currently sitting in Italy because they are traveling all over the world, which we're going to get into living their very best life, and Charlie, who's joining us today, is a fellow podcast host, former stockbroker. There's just so much that we're going to get into. This conversation is going to go in all the directions, so I can't even tell you, because it's everything and I'm so excited.
Speaker 1:What won't we talk about? Charlie, thank you for being with us on the Sugar Daddy podcast today. We're so happy to have you Me too.
Speaker 3:Thank you for having me. As I said, I'm a podcast host, but it's really nice to be able to be a guest, yes, so thank you.
Speaker 1:Absolutely, we feel the same way. It's good to do a little. You know trading of the podcast spots, so let's get into Charlie's bio so everybody knows who we're talking to today, and then we'll get into your first money memory, charlie, speaker and host of the Unicorn Millionaire podcast. They're helping LGBTQ and BIPOC and first gens make 10k in passive income a year so they can twerk their way to early retirement. Yes, honey, they're a formerly undocumented Mexican American and ex stockbroker who has traveled solo to 34 countries. Is the 34 countries up to date? I feel like it's not, because you're currently in Italy 36 now 36.
Speaker 3:Ireland and Northern Ireland. I forgot how easy it is to add them up when you're in Europe, because it's just in walking distance I love it, perfect.
Speaker 1:Well, thank you so much, charlie, for being with us today. Yeah, thanks for having me. We start all of our guests conversations with understanding a little bit about your money history, so we'd love to get into your first money memory before we really get into the conversation.
Speaker 3:So I grew up undocumented. I was born in Morelia, Michoacan, Mexico, and then, at age three, we emigrated and overstayed our visas and moved to rural Washington state in the middle of nowhere, middle of nothing, and the first money memory I have was my dad asking me to lend him money that he had given me when I was like five years old. This was maybe like five, 10, 20 bucks years old. This was maybe like five, 10, 20 bucks. But from that moment on, I associated money with uncertainty and fear and, oh my God, if this is something that scares the adults, I should be scared about this too.
Speaker 3:And in order for me to protect my family and do my job because when you're first gen, you're always parentified. You become the 20 year old when you're fucking five years old. So I was like I'm going to be the saver in my family and take care of everyone. Meanwhile my brother was the spender, always buying things and computers and everything. So I say that to mention how drastically different your money habits can be established, even from your freaking siblings. It is wild. So ever since then, I've been very good with my money and budgeting and saving.
Speaker 3:But then I realized you can't budget or save your way to true early retirement. You have to invest your money and increase your income. When he asked you for the money he gave you back.
Speaker 2:I was like five, I was a child. Yeah, all right, real quick. I want to speak to the person listening who feels like they can't work with a financial planner yet because they're carrying a lot of debt. First of all, I see you and I need you to know you're not broken, you're not behind. You're just in a tough season.
Speaker 2:I created something just for you because I've had people reach out who are serious about changing their money story. But the full financial planning package just wasn't the right fit yet. So I built a new service through Oak City Financial that's focused completely on debt reduction. No fluff, no shame. You'll get a one-time planning session, a personalized payoff strategy, your own financial dashboard and monthly coaching. If you want extra support while you climb out, it's $300 to get started and $100 a month. If you want that ongoing guidance, that's it. This is about helping you get unstuck, not making you feel like you failed. If this sounds like what you've been needing, go ahead and schedule a call with me. The link is in the show notes. Let's take the first step together.
Speaker 1:I was going to say you're going to say something. I saw your face.
Speaker 2:No, I just think it's so like, kind of like how you just mentioned. It's very interesting how Justin and I had saw something not too long ago where you can have siblings that are raised in the same house but you don't experience your parents the same. No matter how much a parent maybe tries to be equal and parent every child the same, no one's going to experience the same parent because one different ages and you know just different personalities of how you interact with your children. So, like you said, it's very interesting how you can have the same scenario in a household but kids take it differently, and gender roles obviously too, the
Speaker 3:women are encouraged to, or people like the assigned female at birth, or assigned like the task of taking care of the rest, while the men can go and make mistakes, invest in things and try and fall flat on their faces. So gender roles definitely tie into that as well.
Speaker 2:Especially, can be exasperated, depending on cultural different cultures as well.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, wow. So you all overstayed your visa. What is that? I mean, like did you, did your parents just not refile the paperwork? And then did you know this at at the time? I mean, you're so young, like do you know? Hey, we're not supposed to be here anymore. What's that?
Speaker 3:like I remember it was 1994 and the Lion King was in theaters yes.
Speaker 3:I just wanted to see the Lion King. It was the golden era. Honestly, the best Disney movies came out from the time I was born in, like 1990 till 1995. Pocahontas, mulan, tarzan that's when it started falling off. But yeah, I didn't know this, I didn't understand that we weren't supposed to be here. I was like, why the fuck are we here? Was the thing. My grandma told me that when you were five, charlie, you were like Mom, why the fuck are we here? This is nice, but why can't we go back to Mexico? Because all our family is there. Like, this is ghetto, it's ghetto here.
Speaker 3:My dad had worked legally in the US a long time ago and so he had a social security number but it had expired. But he used that as a way to like get the visa approval and all these other things too. I don't remember how it works, but he was just like, yeah, I've just been using the social that expired, um, and we ever say it and stuff. And then it came to the point of, okay, it's time to go see our family, cause we don't have any family here. Why can't we go back? And then my mom's dad died and we were about to go back and with the fear of not being able to return since we'd overstayed. It's obviously easier to go back to Mexico through the Tijuana border. They don't really check anything. It was wild. I went through the border for the first time a year ago or so and it was wild that they don't give a fuck. But on the way back, they sure do to the States.
Speaker 3:Um, but then, yeah, my, my grandpa died and we ended up deciding not to go at all to the funeral. And my mom was young. She was in her early twenties. She had me when she was 21. Um, she was in her early twenties. So I can't imagine the trauma of not being able to go to your dad's funeral, who you cared about. It was a big part of your life, because you just were afraid of coming back, of not being able to come back.
Speaker 3:So that's when a couple yeah, well, into childhood, my parents would be like just lie and tell people you were born in Los Angeles. But then, when I kept prodding and asking questions, my dad was like here's the deal, we're not supposed to be here. And I was like this is fucked up, we are doing something wrong. And he was like no, no, no, we're fine, we're fine. So, yeah, that's how I grew up with this, like wait, we're supposed to be good people. Yeah, we're kind of breaking the law by being here.
Speaker 3:And I say that because we were not coming to the US for for a better life, because we were being persecuted, to make more money. My dad was from a middle class white Mexican background, full of privilege, so he just came to the US because he wanted to, because he felt like it. It's different if you're immigrating illegally because you're fighting for your life or you want to be able to send money back home to your home country because your home country was fucked over by the CIA and the US. That made this all happen in the first place. But that was not the case for us. We were privileged immigrants and my last name was Johnson. Now it's Johnson Stover, but I mentioned that because we didn't do this out of necessity. We just did it because my dad felt like it. So that's like a huge caveat to my journey of growing up undocumented too.
Speaker 2:And how long did you remain undocumented?
Speaker 3:Until I was 14, when my mom kept being like to my dad like your kids need to get a job, they need to go to college, they need a social. And my dad was like no, they don't, because my dad was used to his dad sending us money. But very randomly there was like definitely a legacy of financial manipulation within the family too, of him wanting distance as an autistic person, very narrow, divergent it's very important for us to have our own autonomy and not be perceived and not have to explain ourselves. So I get that now. It took me years to understand like why the fuck we moved to the middle of nowhere. It was for that.
Speaker 3:But I remember my grandpa randomly visiting us and him handing money to my dad, like in front of us and handing me money but eating beans and rice, growing up really poor but sometimes being able to have a vacation sponsored by grandpa that would send us to like New York or Las Vegas three times by the time I turned 15, or to go to Hawaii, as long as we could stay in the States. It was. It was wild. The my money store, it was. It was wild y'all. A lot of contrast. So I forgot your last question. No, this is great.
Speaker 2:No, it was just the part of, like you said, you remained undocumented until 14. And what was that process at that age?
Speaker 3:So my mom married uh, my next door neighbor and my dad just like abandoned us and jumped ship and moved back to mexico to live with his dad, rent free. And, yeah, my mom married my stepdad, who was a trump supporter and an alcoholic. So it went from a lot of dysfunction to more dysfunction. So in high school I was a straight A student. I was like I need to get the good grades and all the extracurriculars to get the fuck out of this. And I did. I got a full ride, scholarship, basically heavy financially, to study across the country at Wellesley college in Boston, which was a women's college where it was cheaper for me to go there than to stay in state at any public school.
Speaker 3:Um, so, not a shitty things happened to me, but a lot of lucky things, like the universe would conspire in my favor a lot of moments throughout my life. And it continues to like somebody who's trans, who's queer, who's estranged from family, I don't have anybody supporting me, which is why I'm so on top of my finances. I can't just like when COVID hit, I couldn't just move home with the parents to save money on rent. And as a business owner, there's a toxic rhetoric of like oh, if you really care about your business, you'll just move home with your parents so you can save money. But it's like that's not the case, especially for queer people and then the Latinx community and a lot of communities. You can be gay, but you can't be trans, like I was out as queer, but once I came out as trans, I was not okay too. So there's different layers of it. So that's why I'm really on top of my finances and I help others do the same.
Speaker 2:Forget that not everyone has that support system at home. You know, for example, like with us, like if something we're allowed to take, you know these chances and stuff where, if it didn't work out and we needed help, we needed money, we needed some place to go from a housing standpoint. We have family and they will take care of us, they will help out, and a lot of people don't have that, and it's just. It's just. It's baffling to me that people don't understand that a lot of people don't have that support.
Speaker 1:Are you estranged because your mom married a Trump supporter and you're like I don't need that in my life? Or did your mom say you got to go and just stop contact, Like what's the situation?
Speaker 3:So she divorced that trump supporter and then she started dating another trump supporter, because in the town. Okay, we have a type yeah there's like it's a rural washington state which is not liberal at all. As soon as you cross the cascade mountains, it's like texas y'all it is dry, desert, sagebrush. Red republicans like I didn't come out until. I got out Like I went to dances with Mormon boys, like religious diversity there was, like, what kind of Christian are you? Are you Catholic or are you Mormon?
Speaker 1:Wow, oh my gosh.
Speaker 2:Yeah, we've only been like the Seattle area.
Speaker 1:Right.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I went to Seattle for the first time to live for months at a time to see what the cooler side of Washington was like, and it was definitely worth it. But the rent is ghetto. I was pet sitting full time to not pay money on rent but I was still spending more money to just exist there than I was out here, kind of in Europe, paying for Airbnbs. It's wild how expensive Seattle's gotten. Yeah.
Speaker 1:Okay, let's go into. You were a stockbroker. How do we go from I left home, I got a full scholarship I knew I needed to be able to support myself down the line to I became a stockbroker. What is that trajectory?
Speaker 3:I didn't study finance at all in college, I just wanted to be a social studies teacher. I love history, like I'm autistic and I love memorizing random facts and dates.
Speaker 1:I love that shit, but no one was you and brandon could have an offline conversation about that. I love history.
Speaker 3:Yes, I love encyclopedias and books. It's just like random facts, especially if they're chronologically in order. That's like porn for me. But in my 20s I was like I want to make a difference, I want to save the world and I don't want to sell out. I don't need money because I've made it so far without money because I was on financial aid and stuff and I've scooted by and I grew up poor so I didn't need that. What so?
Speaker 3:I did the Peace Corps and AmeriCorps a lot of educational contract jobs that were exploitative and underpaid me. I was on food stamps throughout my 20s and then, by the time my late 20s hit, I found myself in DC trying to get a cushy government job after Peace Corps, like most Peace Corps volunteers do. But it was the hiring freeze because Trump had gotten elected when I moved to DC and so I could not get a job. So I ended up being a bicycle tour guide on the national mall and doing lots of side hustles, blogging, pet sitting, and I was like I can do this now. But I got my top surgery in DC and I still remember I needed the money so badly and I didn't want to be in debt or fall backward that even post top surgery, when I was still healing, I would walk the dogs and I wouldn't hold them on the leash, but I would tie the leash around my waist, which is not something you should do. You should recover for a full month. And I remember people sending me money for the meal train, to order food for me to go or for delivery, but I was in such scarcity mode that I still cooked like all my meals and use that money to pay the rent and necessities and I was like this is not sustainable. I don't want 65 year old me to suffer like this.
Speaker 3:And that's when I got it together and I decided to hit up a friend who helped me start investing in the first place and showed me a chart of the stock market, and that's all it took. She was like you don't need to be making a lot of money, because at the time I'd never made more than 30k. But she's like as long as you start now, this is how much you're losing out on. And she helped me max out my Roth IRA. So it helped me just understand like, oh, as somebody low income, as long as I put 7k in a year, I'll be fine. And then I was like you've changed my life so much that I want to have your job. And so she said you can come work at Charles Schwab, where we will pay you to take your licenses and your exams and you'll make 45K and as somebody under getting underpaid.
Speaker 1:I was like oh, I can buy a sports car with that.
Speaker 3:Which even 45K. You think, hey, stockbroker, you think that they're you? You know, making hundreds of thousands on wall street, you know? No, it was boring as fuck. I'm sitting in a call center in fucking indianapolis like making password reset calls half the time.
Speaker 3:It was not glamorous, I hated it, but I learned so much about how the stock market actually works and that you don't need to be a fucking day trader. I just saw so many casual millionaire accounts and I just saw them doing the same thing self-managing everything, open up their iras, prioritizing the retirement accounts and then making the brokerage accounts their side bitches. Oh, they need like money for a down payment on house. Boom, sell some stock. They weren't making it this whole thing about themselves because they were rich white men, like they didn't have to do the money healing and shit and money trauma. Like they inherited these ways of just treating money like their bitch. And I was like, oh, I see how this works. And then, yeah, I quit my job after COVID hit like a badass and that 45k salary, but I saved enough to just move to Mexico and get a full ride to my MBA program. And then that's when I started my business and I've been doing it full-time for five years now.
Speaker 1:What is your business, Charlie?
Speaker 3:I'm a money coach, I thought I didn't know what we said in the intro. Like you said, we're going to talk about everything.
Speaker 1:Listen, yeah, no only only in our heads, but not out loud yet.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I'm a money coach for six figure earners and I attract people who are LGBT, bipoc, hella, neuro, spicy people. I attract hella people with, especially with ADHD and ADD, because I'm like the autistic side, where I'm neurodivergent but I can call them out on things they might not be seeing and I helped to gamify finances and make it a lot less scary, which is what everybody needs, no wonder if you're neurodivergent or not. But, yeah, I help my clients get on track to making 30K plus in passive income a year through savings investments, leveling up their credit card game, because a lot of them are making six figures and they need to get their asses to the airport lounge, but they're still using their fucking debit cards debit cards saving cash in venmo and I'm like no we're not doing that.
Speaker 2:No, venmo is not a bank it's so interesting you said about the um, ad and adhd, because we were literally talking about this the other day, where um I to like with my clients, kind of like make sure that they're comfortable to open up to me about all different aspects of who they are as a person and when, those things being impossible, if you know you are ADD, adhd, because that's going to make a difference in regards to like how we communicate. And then also like, for example, like if you're someone who has, you know you have a little bit of an issue as far as getting a list of things done. Me just sending you a list of things to do. It's not the best way for that to be accomplished. So it was just very interesting that you brought that up, because we literally just talked about it with each other.
Speaker 1:Making those accommodations for people who have whatever part of neurodivergence. I mean, I think in some aspect we're all neurodivergent, right, we all learn in our own particular way. But making sure that you're accommodating your clients who maybe, instead of sending them the list of the items they need to do, you schedule a call and you do it together and you walk through it together and check those boxes. So that's I think it's so important because that financial conversation is so intimate. So, charlie, what you're doing and making sure that people understand you know you're a safe space they can learn from you.
Speaker 1:You're not perfect. We're not perfect, nobody's claiming to be. I mean, you clearly have a very specific point of view when it comes to your money story and it's been all over the place, you know, from scarcity mindset all the way to hey, I'm helping other people manage their money and I can do this full time on my own and venture out and start my business. I mean, those are not small things. So I'm sure the people that you're working with are kind of seeing the light right in in terms of, hey, I can do this and I don't have to be be a day trader and I don't have to get a finance MBA in order to grow my wealth and make better choices so that my money works for me.
Speaker 3:Yeah, and I, as somebody who still has not made more than 50K like last year, I barely paid myself more as a business owner than I ever did. At the nine to five I paid myself like 46K just to stay under that tax bracket Very strategic.
Speaker 3:Yes, I can do this, so can you. If you can fully fund happy hour, you can fully fund your 401k, and that's just a big, big thing. I see with a lot of my clients they're making six figures but still living paycheck to paycheck and it's like the the six figure salary is not going to do anything for you, it's still going to work your off. It's not going to do anything for you, it's still going to work your ass off. It's not going to save you unless you invest that money. The point of making more is to invest more, not to buy more crap.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah. If you don't change your habits, it doesn't matter how much more money you make.
Speaker 1:Yeah, right.
Speaker 2:Because you're still going to have the same. You know quote-unquote bad habits. I really also like that, like that. So like I always tell people that you know there's a reason why people have a negative association with financial services because the industry itself has done a terrible job in regards to how it helps people and then also just overall, like I said, mail stale and what is it mail but I like that it's now moving to a place where you have representation in all different aspects.
Speaker 2:You know, like I always tell people, the number one thing, if you're going to work with somebody with your money, is to make sure that you feel comfortable with that person. And, like I said, there's all different types of there's all different types of financial services, people that work with all different communities. And I just love seeing that because, for example, like you know the community that you work with, like I don't have that perspective in that because, for example, like you know the community that you work with, like I don't have that perspective, so I can't put myself in that person's shoes and see through. You know, that lens as far as the things that they've experienced, and it can be very helpful to have someone who has been in your shoes and you know, experience the same things that you've experienced.
Speaker 1:But you do have clients who are part of the LGBTQIA community and they, I mean, we are a safe space, right. So. But I think that perspective of openly saying I'm neurodivergent, I'm trans, I was undocumented, I mean you're ticking a lot of boxes for people who might be coming into the space really scared to open up and talk to anybody. So I mean it's so wonderful that you're a resource for people who need it.
Speaker 3:I'm like here's how I've been fucked over, but that's not an excuse anymore, y'all. And I haven't had like imposter syndrome. When I first started my business, I did feel some type of way when a lot of black women would come to me and I was like, oh my god, I'm not black, I can't help them. Why are they coming to me?
Speaker 1:And it's like, no, I don't have they're not coming to you to get your hair braided. They're not like lay this down for me, Get my edges boo Like. That's not what this is, you know? I mean, this is me going it out, okay, I feel like the Italian.
Speaker 3:Italian, that's fine, I love it, oh, it's so good. But yeah, I've had to overcome that and be like, oh, okay, I'm here to help them with their money and I'm approachable and I make it fun and not make it about me and how, oh, but I just can't understand them on this level too. It's like not about that too, which I feel like a lot of people stop people from starting businesses because they they have a fear of being to this or to that and they can't relate. Like when I started my business, I was like, oh, I might be too white for a lot of people and thank God I didn't listen to that imposter syndrome in my head and just like popped off and went off and was just like, yeah, I have white privilege, but also, this has been fucked over.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and you, you clearly speak fluent Spanish, do you? Because I know Brandon works with a couple of people whose parents are Hispanic and there's like a little bit of things are getting lost in translation and so the children will come on to help with translating. Because, again, like and we talk about it all the time, the finance lingo, right, the abbreviations, everything's an acronym. I mean it's hard to understand, let alone you get into loan terms and conditions and I mean it's, it's a lot. So have you, are you also coaching in Spanish to help people who might have a language barrier?
Speaker 3:No, I insert some Spanglish in there, like one time I had a client and we were talking about her boyfriend and we switched to Spanish so that he didn't understand what was going on. He was having some like money drama around him. She's an Aries and he has some other signs. So I was inserting and we're all like queers, love astrology, and I'm like listen, you have to stop losing your shit. You're Aries, I'm Aries rising, but my gosh, this is how you can approach that money conversation. So that's how it's come in handy for me. And now they've been together. She just bought a house, um, so yeah, that's how I've subversively been.
Speaker 2:Like, let's talk about this in Spanish I think what I noticed from like my experience was was that in those scenarios with the parents spoke English and which I would say, and I think speaking english with a accent and some people's minds makes the person think that the other person is not as smart, and so the way that they were interacting with the person was in a um, kind of like a like talking down to them, yeah, and I was like, yeah, that's, that's a terrible experience, you know, and that's what I think I has happened when, when it it comes to having to translate and stuff, so it's more or less not that I don't understand her, I would make sure she understands me. So it's like your English is fine, my Spanish is absent, non-existent.
Speaker 1:Yeah, but just making people feel comfortable and not dismissing them because of an accent.
Speaker 2:I'll say the one question. I have kind of like a personal question to ask, in the sense of what are some of the things that you've experienced in a negative standpoint from a finance like maybe some financial hurdles as being trans?
Speaker 3:Being trans financial hurdles it's hard for me to think of them because everything's online and investing is so democratic where you, just as long as you understand the words, you just click buttons. There's not like voter suppression and things like that. For me, being trans in my life is more of a hurdle when I'm trying to like get a haircut and I want to go to a barber and I was just in Ireland and the signs on all the barbershops were like this is for gentlemen and their sons, and that's why I've like grown out my hair, kind of Cause I just don't want to deal with going to a barbershop, cause I've been in some like queer friendly cities and I've been turned away because they're just like no, we only cut hair for men. I'm like okay, so I need to have a dick to get a haircut cool, okay so is hair not hair.
Speaker 3:I'm so confused yeah, and this happened in puerto vallarta in mexico, which is a very gay friendly yes and it was a gay male barber who told me this too so I'm.
Speaker 3:That's why, like, transphobia can be alive and well, even within like gay spaces. Being gay does not mean you're queer and inclusive, especially with the gay male community. Yeah, I was very divided when I was there. It was like that's the spaces for the gay men and this is where all the other trans, queer, assigned female at birth, like everybody else like, would hang out together. It was very segregated and divided, but in terms of being trans, I think it's the family estrangement for me, where I'm just like I don't have anybody to fall back on.
Speaker 3:Yes, I've chosen family and I've had friends who I've had to be able to crash within my 20s to save money on rent, but I didn't want to be that friend in my 30s, 40s, 50s. Being like can I sleep on your couch Because I can't find a job right now. So that's more of my transness has influenced me getting it together and wanting to spread the word, because I've had white people mostly be like if you are so good at growing your money, why don't you just invest it for yourself? And I'm like, because I'm not a selfish ass person, like I want other people to benefit as well. It's not about me.
Speaker 1:Let's talk about the life that you're building, because you are all over. I love following you on Instagram. You're always in a different country, different city. I remember vividly the place in Seattle, I think it was because it was gorgeous and I was like, Charlie, where are you living? I need the Airbnb, this place myself. Oh my gosh, the windows, the views that you are like. I mean, I know you have your coaching business, but you're also like no, I'm going to travel the world and I'm going to see all the things I want to see. So my understanding is you're pet sitting in these places. So are you going where you want to go and then opening yourself up to pet sitting so that you have a place to stay? Or like, walk us through the journey, Because I think the way you're living life right now is just really awesome.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I mean a year ago I had to rehome my beloved cat, Luna, who I adopted in Thailand, and I brought her ass all the way over from Thailand to LA and then to Mexico and, my gosh, I told her girl is doing fine, she has a car. Now I don't even have a car. She has a boyfriend. She's like Luna is living her best life.
Speaker 1:Yeah, she's fine.
Speaker 3:I miss her dearly, but I rehomed her because life on the road was not for her and I realized that I'm not done with traveling, especially as somebody with chronic health issues. Like the older I've gotten, the more I'm like, fuck, we need to travel the younger we are, cause if I'm tired and getting overstimulated already, I can only imagine how bad this shit's going to be when I'm 50 or 60. I will not wait until I'm retired to see the world when I have the creaky knees and the aching back like it's only going to be downhill from here. Y'all yeah Um. But then I I decided to uh, I didn't pet sit right away because of the grief and I felt like shit for rehoming her.
Speaker 3:I had to get over the guilt for months, but then, once I got over that, a few months later I decided to move to the Pacific Northwest to reset my nervous system and my inflammation, because I'd been living by the beach, going to hot ass places for the past four years, going from Thailand to to Mexican beaches in the middle of winter time, and my health coach was like you need to go someplace with a winter to reset, cause my hypothyroidism was so bad that I was so sensitive to the cold and that made my information worse that after doing the health cleanse with her, I was like, okay, let me go to the most depressing winter, the Pacific Northwest, where it's cloudy.
Speaker 1:Yeah, gosh, what the fuck's up.
Speaker 3:How much did I heal because I'm a virgo and I'm all or nothing.
Speaker 1:I'm like let's see how good I fix this shit you're like, let me go to like knee depths of snow and really reset.
Speaker 2:No thanks I'm good on that one, the Pacific Northwest.
Speaker 3:the winters are actually kind of mild, it doesn't snow a lot, it doesn't stick. And I decided that since the rent was so ghetto I'm talking like $2,500 just for a basic-ass studio I was like let me just see what will happen if I pay for a trusted house sitters membership it costs $120. And let me just see if I can pet sit while I look for a place or find something more affordable. And then, since I was based there, it was a lot easier because the people on trusted house sitters they want to know if you're based there. They'd rather have somebody who lives in the place than somebody flying over from Germany who might miss their flight and then fuck over their pets. So that's why it was easy for me to get sits booked in Seattle and then I was able to fly to Anchorage, alaska, uh, to pet sit for a queer couple there to see the Iditarod and then pet sit in Portland. So I was like hopping around the Pacific Northwest. And then I assumed it would be the same Now that I've been in Europe since April. I was like I need to get the fuck out of the U? S? Um for political and personal mental health reasons, uh, and then I was like, oh, let me just do the pet sitting thing in Europe. But I'll say it has been a challenge. It has not been as easy at all pet sitting, cause I'm not based anywhere, I'm going around.
Speaker 3:So I was like, let me fly to London and then see what's up, maybe if I can put my location as London and it'll be easier. But by the time I'm in London and I've seen everything, I'm ready to move the fuck on. But I have gotten only three pet sits confirmed the entire three months I've been here, and they're all through Facebook groups for my college alumni group. So at first I was kind of annoyed and pissed. But I was like dude, you're just gonna have to spend more on Airbnb. So you've saved tens of thousands of dollars by pet sitting anyways. Like you'll be fine, like all the rent you've saved will be able to go toward the airbnbs. And I don't have an apartment, I'm not paying tens of thousands of dollars in rent back home. Like my airbnb is still my rent and I'm getting credit card points off that as well. So that's the worst case scenario.
Speaker 3:Um, and I think the universe threw this lesson at me of like this is what money's for baby, like budget for it. It's OK for you to increase your expenses. Don't get pissed off if things aren't going to work the same way here. And it has been nice Like I know that I'm going to be pet sitting for three weeks in Brussels, so I have a skeleton of oh by these dates once a month I know where I have to be and then I cater the rest of my itinerary outside of that. But I have faced a lot of decision fatigue. It was a lot more overwhelming than I thought, because it's so juicy being in Europe. There's so many amazing countries to go to, so much food to eat, so many prides going on and I've had to ask chat GDP to help me calm the fuck down and rein it in and be like you bitch. You need to stay for five days in a place.
Speaker 2:Stop doing this Like no, no, every two days is we have definitely had the conversation about when or if, if and when you know to leave the United States, based upon kind of the trajectory it's going on right now. Yeah Cause, uh, jess and the kids have dual citizenship in Germany, oh so what do you know?
Speaker 1:I know, I know it's a conversation, I think it's. You know, when you add the layer of kids and school and uprooting and it, I think it becomes a little bit more difficult. I think if we didn't have kids, we would at least be like, yeah, let's go over there for six months and like check it out or feel out the vibe, where do we want to be? But it's definitely on the list, what so? How long are you going to be in Europe? What's the plan?
Speaker 3:like the only reason I'm going back to North America, because I'm a good friend, so I'm flying straight to San Diego and then, you know, I go to a wedding in Rosarito in Baja California, and then part of me just wants to come back to Italy and take Italian classes and stuff out here I.
Speaker 3:I spent a month in the UK and then Ireland, northern Ireland I was like this is cute. But now that I'm in Italy I'm like, oh, this is my, my vibe. It's just so sunny and people are friendly and I love how stimulating it is to hear a different language. That kind of sounds like Spanish. So I'm like problem solving and try to figure it out and like trying to remember some of the Italian I studied. So it's a lot more mentally stimulating for me being here than in completely English speaking countries.
Speaker 1:I'm glad.
Speaker 3:I went, but next time I'm flying the fuck out here directly.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I've been to England several times and I haven't really noticed higher to go back.
Speaker 1:No offense but unless I'm like.
Speaker 2:I'm a big soccer fan, so I'd go watch a Manchester United game. Outside of that, I'm good.
Speaker 1:Yeah, charlie, you've had quite the roller coaster and you are, you know, building your life the way it makes sense for you and for you to feel good and have purpose. You're helping others. What, what is the future hold for you? What are you most excited about?
Speaker 3:Trump not being president about.
Speaker 1:Trump not being president, okay, him aside. Yes, we'll retweet that, yes.
Speaker 2:We still got way too many years.
Speaker 1:It's only been like five months guys.
Speaker 3:Not even I know we're exhausted. I know, yeah, it's my little countdown.
Speaker 2:I'm like okay, the term is a long countdown, oh my gosh, 48 months the math is not good I do love it when we because we post this on like youtube as well, and anytime we get into political stuff, you get the you know the trolls and stuff like that.
Speaker 1:So it's always like we love this until you got political and we're like great money is political. If you don't understand that by now, like we are not for you.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah. I mean I will say in Europe it's nice. No one asked me if I voted for Trump or not, because I'm so queer, I'm so fucking gay that people know I'm on the left Like, unless you're blind, my gosh.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I'm excited about my health being good because a year ago I went through my health crisis where I had the worst inflammation eczema flare-up of my life after being on steroid creams for decades. The steroid creams stopped working and my dermatologist wanted to put me on immunosuppressants. And the doctors didn't know what was going on. I had multiple bacterial infections, I had a leaky gut. I didn't understand what was going on and none of these Western health professionals could help me a lot. So I hired two health coaches, realized I was like almost pre-diabetic because I had insulin and sugar absorption issues I had no idea about and, yeah, the hypothyroidism, which was what making me go to all these hot ass places, making my inflammation worse. So I'm really proud of myself for investing a lot of fucking money. It was not cheap Hiring all these health coaches and shopping organic in the US isn't cheap but I'm so happy that I invested in myself because you can have a pop in 401k, a six figure salary, but if you're not healthy, none of that matters. And today, for the first time after a year of not going swimming in the ocean, I was finally able to swim in the ocean and it felt so nice to not have my face hurt or be in pain or have to apply cream right after. I was like, okay, this the the glow up was. It took a long time for me to naturally heal and purge all the crap and detox, but now I can have pizza. I've stopped drinking alcohol because the headaches aren't worth it anymore, and I've had to be good about my health habits. I've had to stop drinking coffee first thing in the morning, but it's, it's been worth it. So I'm excited to be able to get back on track to traveling, because I couldn't look away.
Speaker 3:My health issues were so bad and I love sharing it because I know it resonates with a lot of people. As a highly sensitive person, I was angry at my body. I was like these fucking 70 year olds can drink 10 beers and not feel a thing. Why me? Why me? And I was like, oh, they probably just have like chronic headaches or IBS or other things. It's not like. Your immune system manifests in different ways, it looks different for different people and I think that if I'd had chronic pain, I wouldn't. I would have waited even longer.
Speaker 3:It was the eczema and my skin being so bad. And the Mexicans I have no filter. They'd be like what the fuck is wrong with your skin. Your skin looks burned. What the fuck? Every day I go to like the grocery store and they'd be like, oh, your skin looks better today. Every day I'd go to like the grocery store and they'd be like, oh, your skin looks better today. Oh my God, what's wrong with you?
Speaker 3:And I think for that reason, because my chronic illness is such a front facing thing, I finally decided to do something about it. But it took 33 years to for this to happen. So I'm excited to be able to see the world taking care of my health and living that slower life and honestly, there's a lot of slow days out here. I've been in Southern Italy for five days and I've only taken like one day to see everything, but I've had to be okay with that and laying low and resting a lot more than in my 20s. It's a lot about compromise, because this is the long term, this is my life. I'm not here for a two week vacation, so why would I pressure myself to like? In Spanish we say sacarle el jugo, like take the juice out of everything. I don't have to do that anymore.
Speaker 3:But that's a lot of scarcity that I have to remind myself of. That a lot of my clients deal with is letting go of that scarcity of like we got to do this all now in Europe.
Speaker 1:I mean, yeah, you'll sit on a Sunday and have a four hour breakfast or brunch or coffee, you know, coffee meeting with a friend, or it's just such a like. No, we're here to enjoy life, not just work ourselves to death. So it's nice that you get to experience that more regularly. If you could leave our listeners with a piece of advice money, life, you know, finance, growth, investing, whatever you want it to be, what, what would you say?
Speaker 3:Stop asking people for advice. Who's like money lives don't reflect what you want yours to look like. Like the stock market crashed a few weeks ago and everybody was posting on Facebook groups asking other people who didn't understand what the fuck they were doing, what they should do, and now that's the stock market's fully recovered. It's so quiet now and it's like this is going to keep happening. Y'all. The stock market was designed to crash Always, has, always will. So get it together and hire, like a coach, a financial professional to guide you. And you're at this level of building wealth. You can't afford not to invest in your money and your growth, so that you stop stressing out every time the stock market crashes. It's really clear.
Speaker 3:I think, being money coaches, you can see like we were nervous and stuff. We were seeing the stock market crash. But I think I was nervous because I was like fuck, this is going to affect a lot of people. I wasn't. I was worried about my finances. I was just worried about how this was going to emotionally take a toll on people. But once you understand how it works, you can like separate yourself and that's why we do what we do to calm people.
Speaker 2:The fuck down about money at the end of the day and enjoy their lives you know, setting them up, for I think really what is important is framing it for them and so that they have a very, very good understanding as far as how the stock market works. Like you said, like it's going to go up, it's going to go down. You know, most of my clients are around my age, so I was like a lot of the money that you're looking to use you're not going to use for another 20 years. This is going to happen so many more times. Yeah, just go, don't worry about it. Just understand and also take the opportunity.
Speaker 3:And really explain to them what the opportunity can be when the stock market does crash. For you, yes, speaking my language.
Speaker 1:Charlie, where can our listeners find you if they want to connect and follow your journey?
Speaker 3:You can follow my Italian traveling saga on Instagram. By the time this drops, I'll probably be in New Zealand. I don't know. I'm at Traveler Charlie on Instagram. My podcast is called Unicorn Millionaire and I have a blog called unicornmillionairecom and I offer six-month money coaching programs all the time for people wanting to get their money right, and I sometimes offer one-off calls. I like to call them DOM sessions. You can DOM your money instead of the other way around.
Speaker 1:I love it. We will make sure to link all of that in the show notes. Thank you so much, Charlie, for being with us today. We appreciate you so much.
Speaker 3:Yay, thank you, and let's get you to Germany. Yeah, we appreciate you so much. Yay, thank you.
Speaker 1:And let's get you to Germany, don't forget. Benjamin Franklin said an investment in knowledge pays the best interest. You just got paid. Until next time. Sugar Daddy Podcast, yo Learn how to make them pockets grow.
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